Things I learned living in Texas .

1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas.

3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in Texas, plus a couple no one's seen before.

4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.

5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words.

6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!

7. 'Jaw-P?' means 'Did ya'll go to the bathroom?'

8. People actually grow and eat okra.

9. 'Fixinto' is one word.

10. There is no such thing as 'lunch'. There is only dinner and then there is supper.

11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you're two.

12. Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'

13. The word 'jeet' is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'

14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH EM.

16. 'No, Chew?' is a common response to the question 'Did you bring any beer?'

17. You measure distance in minutes.

18. You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.

19. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.

20. You know what a 'DAWG' is.

21. You carry jumper cables in your car --- for your OWN car.

22. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and Ketchup.

23. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports and gossip.

24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm'.

26. You know all four seasons: almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.

27. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World'.

28. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chicken stew weather.

29. Fried catfish is the other white meat.

30. We don't need no dang Driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive, dag-nabbit.

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Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas .

1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles

2. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles

3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas

4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos, July 4, 1883.

5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water.

6. The Heisman Trophy ws named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston .

7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America.

8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes.

9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.

10. Worst natural disaster (a hurricane) in US history was in 1900, in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island .

11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20, 1969, was " Houston ."

12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island .

13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43" in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979.

14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union ) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states.

15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old.

16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.

17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper.

18. Texas has had six capital cities: Washington -on- the Brazos, Harrisburg , Galveston , Velasco, West Columbia and Austin .

19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U.S. which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet).

20. The name " Texas " comes from the Hasini Indian word "tejas" meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas .

21. The State Mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.).

22. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston .



Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie , Texas:

(1) Just one God.

(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.

(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.

(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.

(5) Put nothin' before God.

(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.

(7) No killin'.

(8) Watch yer mouth.

(9) Don't take what ain't yers.

(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff

Now that's kinda plain an' simple don'tcha think?

Just two things that were not included, so far:

1) Astro turf was invented for the Astrodome in Houston

2) Palestine , TX was left off the cities list

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I've been living here in Texas for 4 1/2 years now and I've learned to love this place and the people here. There are lots of things written about Texas and here are some of it.

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas...

If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas ;

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas ;

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas ;

If "Vacation" means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas ;

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas ;

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas ;

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas ;

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas ;

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas ;

If you find 60 degrees "a little chilly," you may live in Texas ;

If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas .



Need to be cheered up?

Happy, Texas 79042

Pep, Texas 79353

Smiley, Texas 78159

Paradise, Texas 76073

Rainbow, Texas 76077

Sweet Home, Texas 77987

Comfort, Texas 78013

Friendship, Texas 76530

Love the Sun?

Sun City, Texas 78628

Sunrise, Texas 76661

Sunset, Texas 76270

Sundown, Texas 79372

Sunray, Texas 79086

Sunny Side , Texas 77423

Want something to eat?

Bacon, Texas 76301

Noodle, Texas 79536

Oatmeal, Texas 78605

Turkey, Texas 79261

Trout, Texas 75789

Sugar Land, Texas 77479

Salty, Texas 76567

Rice, Texas 75155

And top it off with:

Sweetwater, Texas 79556

Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!

Detroit, Texas 75436

Colorado City, Texas 79512

Denver City, Texas 79323

Klondike, Texas 75448

Nevada, Texas 75173

Memphis, Texas 79245

Miami, Texas 79059

Boston, Texas 75570

Santa Fe, Texas 77517

Tennessee Colony , Texas 75861

Reno, Texas 75462



Feel like traveling to far off lands? Don't bother buying a plane ticket!

Athens, Texas 75751

Canadian, Texas 79014

China, Texas 77613

Egypt, Texas 77436

Ireland, Texas 76538

Turkey, Texas 79261

London, Texas 76854

New London, Texas 75682

Paris, Texas 75460



No need to travel to Washington D.C .

Whitehouse, Texas 75791



We even have a city named after our planet!

Earth, Texas 79031



And a city named after our State!

Texas City, Texas 77590



Exhausted?

Energy, Texas 76452



Cold?

Blanket, Texas 76432

Winters, Texas

Like to read about History?

Santa Anna, Texas

Goliad, Texas

Alamo, Texas

Gun Barrel City, Texas

Robert lee, Texas


Need Office Supplies?

Staples, Texas 78670


Men are from Mars, women are from:

Venus, Texas 76084


You guessed it..it's on the state line..

Texline, Texas 79087


For the kids...

Kermit, Texas 79745

Elmo, Texas 75118

Nemo, Texas 76070

Tarzan, Texas 79783

Winnie, Texas 77665

Sylvester, Texas 79560


Other city names in Texas , to make you smile.....

Frognot, Texas 75424

Bigfoot, Texas 78005

Hogeye, Texas 75423

Cactus, Texas 79013

Notrees, Texas 79759

Best, Texas 76932

Veribest, Texas 76886

Kickapoo, Texas 75763

Dime Box , Texas 77853

Old Dime Box , Texas 77853

Telephone, Texas 75488

Telegraph, Texas 76883

Whiteface, Texas 79379

Twitty, Texas 79079


And last but not least, the Anti-Al Gore City

Kilgore, Texas 75662


And our favorites...

Cut n Shoot, Texas

Gun Barrell City, Texas

Hoop And Holler, Texas

Ding Dong, Texas

and, of course,

Muleshoe , Texas

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I hope this does not offend anyone.....but its funny....

A girl walks into a bar in Texas , orders a beer and sits down at the
bar where a Mexican and an Iraqi are also drinking beers.

The Mexican drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In Mexico our glasses are so cheap we don't need to drink from the same glass twice."

The Iraqi, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his AK-47 and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In Iraq we have so much sand to make glasses that we don't need to drink out of the same glass twice either."

The Texas girl, cool as a cucumber, picks up her beer and drinks it, throws her glass into the air, pulls out her gun, shoots the Mexican and the Iraqi, then catches her glass. She says, "In Texas we have so many illegal Mexicans and Arabs that we don't have to drink with the same ones twice".

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